one hour in and i’m already bored.

please tell gw to stop confusing doodie for duty

please tell kerry to fucking kick it up a notch already. tear him apart man

please tell gw to stop telling me how it’s hard work to be the president.

judging by what he is weraring and that moustache, i can’t help but think this photo was taken at the precise moment he was delivering the punchline to the joke

“What has two thumbs and likes blow jobs?”

waffles

sausage

grits



well, 2 out of 3 ain’t bad

the candidates star in their very own cross-dressing road movie!

sometimes i miss my friends

sometimes i wonder what they would have looked like with a goatee

sometimes i do both

me!

i spent 100bux on groceries the night before a ginat storm rolled into town.

without even thinking, “maybe i should buy sed groceries in a couple of days when i know my power won’t go out for half a day.”

so now i get to toss out all the delicious luncheon meats, cheeses, and other perishables and start all over.

runner up – the mailman

for leaving my records outside my door during a hurricane.

i saw this video a few weeks ago but then coulndn’t remember where

it made me laugh

then magically today, clark came through again and sent me the link. thank you.

and now i pass the savings and hilarity on to you.

stay down stay down

6:00 PM

when it comes to deciding between Cold Stone Creamery and DQ Blizzards, i think i like the Blizzard more

The Creamery isn’t so creamy. it was just a hunk of ice cream with a chunk of crap in it totally not “mixed in”

The Blizzard on the other hand is a delicious creamy mix of ice cream and topping. a perfect combination, a perfect consistency, a perfect mix.

so next time i want a tasty treat and i want to ignore my slowing metabolism – DQ Blizzard it is!

but now i have a meeting with killing some nazis care of Medal Of Honor

6:05 PM

One of the things i love about Medal Of Honor is it’s ranking system. At the end of each round it gives you a ranking according to how many enemies you took out and which body parts you shot the most. i just scalped so many nazis i was ranked a discount barber.

6:20 PM

hmmm…werk more or kill nazis

let’s see, on the one hand there’s work.

and on the other hand there’s constructing a time machine to take me back to the time of the nazis, and then for several years be invovled in tours of duty all across the western front…

well, nazis must be killed

you don’t want them running rampant now do you?

6:25 PM

at the moment i have found the french resistance’s hideout, and as you know have become quite the sadistic sharpshooter…known across the resistance as the discount barber

6:35 PM

since the french resistance is anti-nazi, what good is finding their hideout?

unless you too are hiding out.

in which case- you might go with a better army than the french

6:45 PM

well, it seems the french resistance had some attache case i needed, so i swiped that off a dead guy then made my way through the sewers of some town. i had to take out some german sheppards the nazis programmed to kill.

oh, and now i am ranked as a melon popper.

i tell ya

i’m all head shots

But, as one of W.’s Yalie frat brothers tells Kelley, it’s not the substance abuse in Bush’s past that’s disturbing, it’s the “lack of substance … Georgie, as we called him, had absolutely no intellectual curiosity about anything. He wasn’t interested in ideas or in books or causes. He didn’t travel; he didn’t read the newspapers; he didn’t watch the news; he didn’t even go to the movies. How anyone got out of Yale without developing some interest in the world besides booze and sports stuns me.” New Yorker writer Brendan Gill recalls roaming the Kennebunkport compound one night while staying there looking for a book to read — the only title he could find was “The Fart Book.”

GW won’t be adding Kitty Kelley’s new book, “The Family” to that shelf. In it she shows how the first family intimidates those who’ve tried to expose the clan’s dark secrets of drugs, drinking, womanizing and nepotism.