i had another dr appt this morning

9:30

though that’s far from the time i actually saw the doctor.

i got to spend an hour in the waiting room and almost another hour in the waiting wating room, or post-waiting room.

i did get to hear all about some lady’s wig business during that first hour.

but back to me. the original reason i was going – or so i thought – was to learn of a problem. my eeg from a couple weeks ago would only warrant a return visit if the brain dr saw anything abnormal in it. sure as shit i got a call last friday requesting my presence in the dr’s office. so i make my 930 appt hoping to be outta there lickity split (foolish pipe dream).

so i sit there in the waiting room, snoring drooling guy to the left of me, chatty cathy the wig lady to the right. all i want is to get in, get whatever findings there were and get out. and i wait…and wait…

i get called into the post waiting room – one of my favorite features of the doctor’s office – and am told it won’t be long. and i believe it (foolish pipe dream). here i get to wait with an entirely new set of familiar distractions. yup, there’s the diploma, there’s the picture of what i can only asume is the graduating class at brain school,

oh, look, it’s my old friend the pain scale.



yup, they’re all there to keep me company on my never ending wait to see what the hell is wrong with me and my head.

well, after all of this, the doc enters and sits down. we exchange our niceties. hello, how do you do. he looks at some charts and figures. and now here comes the moment of truth. i learn what it was that he called me in for. i’ve prepared myself for it. i’m sure there was another erratic brain activity while i was sleeping. i will have to be put on some more meds. “well, rene, there’s nothing abnormal about this eeg. yeah, everything looks fine. so, if you are still going to follow the path of keeping an eye on things rather than surgery…i will follow up with you in a year.” i fidgeted for a bit, wondered about specific dates and follow ups, and tests, and he told me, as if he had known me for years, “stop. don’t look at the dates. don’t worry about it. stop obsessing.” well, i will try.

i guess i should have been stoked. i guess i was. i’m still confused. i still wonder and worry. and i still had to go to work afterwards.