For an early Xmas present, Mitchell got this Santa doll

The two were inseparable for weeks. It was the first stuffed toy not to get demolished and gutted within seconds of receiving it.

It’s headless now.

I know I have said it before, but there is nothing better than watching drunk girls ‘dance walk’ to the dance floor.

WooHoo – the first steps to a new look. But now I am hungry and need Margaritas.

well damn it’s now past 2 and i’ve gotten nothing accomplished today – except finishing the office. it took months but I have finally watched them all. I win.

I realize that I am now 30 which officially puts me “in my thirties,” but if I go to one more adult holiday party complete with a variety of cheese balls and honey baked hams and have to listen to any more people mill about and talk about their careers and bonuses and new houses and babies and other notoriously bullshit boring topics of conversation I am calling it quits. Would someone tackle a christmas tree already?

Last night was one of those rare occasions where I went to a strip club. Last night was also one of those rare occasions where I saw a stripper with a gaudy sparkly necklace (probably made up of cubic zirconia) that said MILF. She came to our table and talked to us. Then said “Well, off to go make money…I’m a mom.”

Had a gig at Chateau Elan – where a little bit of France meets a whole lotta Georgia – the other night. in order to “prepare” the folks there let us have a room. You know, to warm up in and drink the booze I snuck in. We made a fake “things to accomplish” on the dry erase board.

I like thinking someone came in afterwards and felt jipped by the lack of my Gary Coleman impression in the 2nd Scene.

best worst waste of two hours in order to watch the best worst christmas movie….
the twelve days of christmas eve – it’s scrooge meets groundhog day meets made for tv movie production starring steven weber. yeah, the guy from wings. no, not that one. that one was in dr. jekyll and ms. hyde. the other one. the taller one.

If you get the chance, watch Gacy. Not because it is a good movie.
But John Wayne Gacy is played by Francis from Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. And he played him with the same je ne sais quoi that says “that guy wants that freakin’ bike” … in order to abduct, sexually assault, and kill young men.

It’s not every night I get to say, “You punched me in the balls so hard ham came out of my nose.”